Russian Women Myths

Published: 15th February 2007
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Russian Women Myths

Recently, many frustrated American and Western men have been trying their luck at finding a Russian woman to marry. With all of this interest, several Russian women myths have sprung up. Some of these are the product of Russian women agencies, and some are from Western society or jealous Western or American women. Here is the truth behind some of the more common of these Russian women myths.

Myth #1: These Russian women are just looking for a ticket "out"

Another variation of this myth is that Russian women dislike Russian men. The fact of the matter is that most Russian women would simply love to be able to find a decent and loving man in their own country. However, for many this is simply not possible, due to a variety of factors. There is a huge alcohol problem, especially among the men. Also, due to the relatively poor economy (despite the fact that things have gotten a bit better in recent years, they are not THAT much better yet), many men are not able to find decent jobs. Therefore, many do not even see the point in starting a family, because they are afraid they would not be able to take care of a wife plus children. Of course, alcohol plus economic frustration can lead to domestic violence and abuse. I will not say that this is a common occurrence, but it happens enough to be not surprising.

If one were to just take a look at the numbers of ladies registered with online dating and marriage agencies, you will see it is a very, very small percentage of the Russian female population. I have heard it estimated that there are maybe only 200,000 ladies registered with these dating agencies. The population of Moscow alone is around 10.6 million. This means that the female population of just Moscow is approximately 5.5 million. So, less than 4% of the ladies are registered! And that is only taking into consideration just ONE large city. Of the total population, less than 1% of the women are actually actively looking for a foreign husband. So, clearly these women are not simply looking for a way out.

Myth #2: The Russian women profiled are not "real

Some have asserted that many, if not most, of these women profiled are of prostitutes, models (who have just had their photos stolen), or other unsavory situations. Of course, anyone can post a profile, so I do not want to say this is totally untrue. However, the vast majority of these profiles are legitimate and genuine. The problem lies in the fact that Russian ladies really are generally more beautiful than their western sisters. Russian women always try to dress very neat and stylish. They take very good care of themselves, because in their culture, this is how you go about being a woman and how you attract a man. Russian is still a very male-oriented and traditional society. This is very hard for many American (and other Western) women to understand. Another factor in this is the fact that very few people have cars in Russia. Therefore, these ladies typically walk 1-2 miles every day. This keeps her in very good shape. Also, many of these ladies are always smiling. You simply must go to Russia and experience these differences for yourself.

Myth #3: The only Western men seeking Russian women are old, ugly or desperate

This is totally contrary to every statistic compiled. The average man who seeks his happiness in Russia is typically in his mid-30's to early 40's. He has a successful career, with an above average income (usually $50,000+), is a homeowner, university graduate, and computer savvy. It is split about 50-50 between those who have been divorced and those who are single, never married. Typically these men could certainly find a woman in their own country, but for a variety of reasons they have CHOSEN to look elsewhere.

Possibly 5% of the men are 50 or over, and another 5-9% are younger than their mid-30's. In fact, just to prove this point I was 29 during my first trip to Kiev, Ukraine. There were 2 other men my age or younger, 2 guys were in their 50's, and approximately 35 others fit in the typically age and income profile. That's 12% younger, 5% older and 82% within the general guidelines as explained above.

Myth #4: To find a Russian woman is a very difficult, expensive and rarely successful process

It is certainly not easy, but it is a very simple and not difficult process. The way to find a Russian woman: go online and start sending email letters, perhaps start telephone calling after a while, later go meet in person, possibly later go back for another trip to be sure, decide upon marriage and start filling out the basic paperwork required for her to obtain a visa. Honestly, some men are able to find their future wives on their very first trip to Russia, but for most it will take several trips.

Depending on one's income level, it MAY be an expensive proposition. You could spend $2000 or 3000 on a trip...or you could spend $10,000. And of course, it does cost money to write to a woman through an agency (but even these costs can be minimized, by using free sites, or working out a bulk pricing deal with the agency). It depends on each person. If you fit the typical profile (i.e. are making a comfortable income) it is certainly something that is affordable. Also, many of the men who make this decision will eventually stop dating local women. Even with 2 trips a year to Russia, Ukraine or the Former Soviet Union (FSU), you would probably be no worse than spending the same amount you would have while dating local women.

As far as the degree of success, the US INS (which has now been renamed the USCIS), had done a study of these 'foreign bride' marriages. After 5 years, it was reported that a full 80% of these marriages were still together. Compare that to a US divorce rate of around 50%, and a divorce rate in Russia of approximately 75%. So, you tell me where you have the best chance for success?

Myth #5: Russian Women want older men; a big age difference does not matter

This is a myth propagated by the Russian dating and marriage agencies. Of course, they want every man to think that he has a reasonable chance with any woman on their site. There is a grain of truth to this in the fact that Russian (and actually most European) women do want a man who is a little bit older. However, women are still women. She will be able to accept a 10 year difference, possibly a 15 year age difference in rare circumstances. Outside of this and you are playing into the agency myth.

Myth #6: It will be very difficult for a Russian woman to adapt to a Western lifestyle

Again, this is simply not true. I think this originated with jealous American women! A Russian woman is usually very well educated; most do indeed have University degrees and even studied English. Some already speak English or another second (or even third) language. There are many places in Russia or the FSU where she can take English classes, and every woman I have known completes these with a fervor that would amaze you. The same goes for driving. She can take driving classes before coming to the West. During the time period while you are waiting for the fiancée paperwork to process is the perfect time for all of these classes.

Russia is much more of a cash economy than America or Western Europe. So finances may require a bit of adjustment. But this is really just a matter of clear communication and being taught and shown. Once she understands and sees how everything is done, you will be amazed with how quickly she will adapt. The most important thing to remember is to make her feel comfortable.

These are by no means all of the misinformation that we are hearing about Russian women these days, but they are the most prevalent.

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